So, what have I achieved thus far ....

Gah, what a horrid question to ask yourself, you'll only ever fall short of your childhood ambitions of 'where I should be/have done by the time I'm really old'. In fact, depressingly, I believe I once decreed that anything over 29 was ancient and I would hate to be 'that old'. Fucking youth, it sets you up for a giant fall when you blink and realise that your skin elasticity and days of clubbing 'til dawn are long gone. Do I feel like I've done what I wanted to do? Probably not, I'm not a famous author, nor am I a vet, so my childhood dreams clearly never panned out (in my defence I hate blood/guts/bodily fluids of any kind - human or animal - so my career as a vet would have been severely limited) As for being an author, I never managed the peaceful garret room overlooking the Seine that I'd planned on penning my first best seller from, so on that score it was an epic fail.

What have I achieved? What am I most proud of? Well, the kids for one thing I guess, for someone who can't put together flat pack shelves, growing 3 little human beings was quite an achievement. They give me an ernomous sense of purpose. That's not to say I'm living the dream I had when pregnant with Jbird of floating around wearing White Company outfits and cooking up gourmet food for 3 appreciative Boden catalogue model children whilst still being uber glam, sexy wife. Oh no, no, no - I am screechy Mummy/bad tempered Mummy and over protective Mummy, as well as being lovely Mummy, mummy who bakes and mummy who wants to instill a spirit of adventure in her kids. I am also *shamed face* the kind of wife I swore I'd never be - fat of arse, grumpy of temper and sometimes too tired to talk to my gorgeous husband. I try, truly I do, but after an evening of dinner/bath/bed routine, followed by the washing/dishwasher/tidy the house routine, I'd quite happily skulk off to bed at 9pm. This, apparently, will get easier as the kids either get older or learn to load and unload the dishwasher/washing machine. I'll let you know if it's true. If I have the energy to type.

I'd like to be proud of more though so I'm sat here, wracking my brains trying to come up with more .... am I a good friend? A good daughter/sister? I like to think I am, I can be viciously sarcastic and use humour aa a defence mechanism when I'm nervous, so sometimes I may indicate to people that I'm just not that bothered about them. I am though, I invest a lot in friendships/relationships. Some fall by the wayside naturally, some new ones sneak in when you're not looking and some stand the test of time. The sign of a true friendship is realising that you'd still like that person if you met now, in the present, as opposed to way back when. It's also about realising that you'd still be friends with them even if they didn't know all that dodgy sh*t about you from way back when!